was two years out of college when I found myself on a date with this younger girl who was still going to school at my alma mater. I’d always thought she was hot, but I was being realistic and not really expecting too much from this date. She seemed like a good girl, and I doubted that she would put out unless she was in a serious relationship (which I was not about to enter into with her). So, I figured my chances of getting play were pretty slim, but I went out with her anyway because she was a nice person and, hey, hope springs eternal, doesn’t it?It was an enjoyable evening, but nothing to write home about. I had never thought much of those guys who graduate and then stick around school to poach underclass ass rather than moving on with their lives, so I will admit to being a bit self-conscious picking her up and dropping her off from school. When I pulled up in front of her dorm to drop her off after our dinner, I was ready to cut my losses and call it a night. That’s when she invited me up to her dorm to hang out.

“Hang out”? As in: “hang out with all her underclassmen dorm friends and be that lame guy who graduated but still needs to slum at school just to flirt with some girl who isn’t going to give him any action anyway?” No thank you. And if you are screaming right now as you read this, wondering how I could be such an idiot and miss such an obvious invitation for booty, you are absolutely right.

“Do you want to come up to my dorm room and hang out?”
“Oh, man. It’s tempting, but I’m afraid it’s getting late, and I do have to work tomorrow.”
“Are you sure?”

Yes, yes, I know, I know. Sometimes we miss things even when they are staring us right in the face. Yes, ladies and gentlemen, I am a moron.

1. Wallet, purse, handbag and money or/and credit cards. It may be the guy’s task to pay but the woman should not appear empty handed just in case.

2. Condoms for both men and women. We are living in a modern age, so modern thinking is required, whatever your morality and outlook. Stay sensible.

3. Mobile or cellular phone. For women this is an essential security device as well as an aid to keeping in contact with your date should arrangements go awry or the cab is late.

4. A piece of paper with directions and address of the restaurant or location you are meeting together with your date’s cellular number if they have one. That way you won’t find yourself in the embarrassing situation of not knowing where you are going.

5. A sense of humor. Okay it’s not a thing but it is the one factor that ruins dates more than anything else, the inability to laugh and enjoy. Going on a date in a bad mood is not going to make anyone feel special.

6. A flower. A nice touch for a guy to show he has thought about his date by bringing a single flower that he has actually gone and purchased rather than stealing from a local garden.

7. If conditions require it, take an umbrella. There is nothing worse than spending hours getting ready, only for a rogue shower to ruin everything. This is particularly true towards the end of the evening, so be prepared and do not allow yourself to feel cold or wet. Discomfort can ruin everything.

8. Take some trust and common sense in equal amounts. You have to trust people from the outset otherwise you are fooling yourself. Remember that people are innocent until proven guilty so don’t take along an attitude that your new date is as bad as your ex until proven otherwise, otherwise love will elude you. By the same token common sense will ensure you can spot danger signals and warning signs in your date and whether you are or are not indeed compatible.

9. Carry a small pocket diary and pen, especially the guy. This will make you look organised and professional and allows you to arrange a second date together as well as make a note of his or her number. Try not to have lots of other girls/boys names on the pages you are liable to be writing in.

10. If you are attending some event, make sure you have the tickets in advance and that you have them with you. Trying to gain entry for a concert, theater, movie or gig on the day may backfire so don’t leave things to chance and disappointment.

11. And finally, make sure you haven’t left your personality at home either. Whilst first dates can be quite daunting for many, there is no excuse for forgetting yourself. So many people feel overawed by the moment that they suppress who they are, forget themselves and find themselves tongue tied. It is as much your date as theirs so remember that this is quality time for you to have fun and relax, yes relax. Enjoy the conversation that flows.

When faced with the prospect of dating ideas with someone new, it is always amazing how quickly one’s mental creative energies normally nuclear fuelled take on the attributes of the Sahara Desert. Yes, Saturday and Sunday need to be filled as does Tuesday evening with person X and what have you thought of so far ? Zilch!

Ironically, whilst our minds are buzzing with thousands of ideas they are usually all useless and not appropriate in this instance. Two weeks last Thursday you could have thought of flying to Niagara Falls for dinner, ballooning over Paris at dawn or swimming naked together by moonlight in your local pool. But two weeks later with new date on the phone and even worse heading to meet you after work and you can think of absolutely nothing at all. Worse still, you have no preference and start using phrases like “no, that’s fine, whatever you like, its up to you, you choose”.

Stop right there. There is a danger here of appearing completely useless and about to fall at the first hurdle so its time to pre-plan and get your thinking caps on. Its time for dating ideas. Of course dating ideas differ depending on whether it is first date, second date or so on. Maybe you are hoping that the third date will be spent in bed but lets not get ahead of ourselves. For now we will stick to social functions and activities their parents would approve of.

The key to dating in the early stages is keeping it manageable, relatively inexpensive, within easy travel proximity’s and also within manageable timelines. Particularly on a first date, you may wish to leave early, or so may they. An exit plan for both guys and girls is always useful. After the initial date the key to good dating ideas is to make them sociable, relaxed, fun, public and open-ended. Lets face it, why stop a date that is really going well. That is why I favor lunchtimes for first dates and afternoons for weekend second dates. Lunchtimes are good because they have predetermined time restrictions and can be abandoned if necessary with little harm done. Saturday afternoons are great for a second date because that allows both of you to over run if things are going really well.

Dinner is often the case for a first date but its often too formal leading to too much social pressure. Both parties feel obliged to finish the meal even if its going badly and there is always a decent sized bill to cap it all. Its late in the day so parties may not sparkle as they normally would, there may be transport issues, darkness, alcohol, fatigue, dress and very importantly, the restaurant may not be to both tastes.

So with this in mind here are some ideas for keeping things fun, real and enjoyable. Make your own list in advance of any dating for your own city so that you have some ideas in advance. Always have a good food guide and know some nice daytime places to visit. Oh and always avoid places where you can’t chat, like the movies!

First Date

• Lunchtime convenient coffee shop

• Lunchtime restaurant

• Early evening restaurant

Second Date

• Weekend walk in the park and lunch

• Visit the Zoo and lunch

• Ice skating - always a winner

• Indoor Bowling and dinner

• A ballgame or sports event and lunch

• Art Gallery and museums

Third Date

• Amusement and adventure park

• All day Water park - Summer !

• Visit the beach and lunch

• Include them in a sporting activity

• Visit a tourist attraction and take in drinks and dinner

• Theater and dinner

• Adventure Activity

If you like some one you may have to ask them for a date. For men this is standard practise and for women, this process is becoming increasingly common. If you are thinking of asking someone on a date consider the following quick dating tips:

1. Why are you asking them out, is it for the right reasons and what do you expect as a result of them saying yes or no?

2. Be prepared that the person you ask may say no and in which case do not take the rejection personally.

3. When asking someone out choose your moment carefully and practise what you might say in advance so that you don’t appear tongue-tied.

4. If the person you ask says yes, ensure you already have thought of a place, date and time for the date so that you display signs of thoughfulness.

5. Be prepared for the person asking why you want to date them so that you are able to flatter and create a sense of trust immediately. People can be wary and they may want to know some reasosn behind your request. Better, anticipate this by saying “would you like to come to dinner, I have always thought you are great fun..”.

6. Make sure that your request for a date does not pressurize the person in any way. If they want to think about it, let them. But don’t chase.

7. Make sure that when you ask someone on a date you smile and keep things fun and happy. Being confident and smiley will elicit a far more positive response.

8. Always have an alternative date and time or location in mind should the person be unsure of their diary. Giving a person a choice is often a marketing masterstroke.

9. If the person says no, don’t chase for a reason, simply move on. They may think about things and get back to you with a yes response later.

10. If you ask someone on a date, make sure that you actually intend to go through with it. Standing people up is not allowed.

11. If you are being asked out don’t play games. If you need time to consider the offer then say so. If you want to say no, say no. But do not keep someone hanging on for no reason. You wouldn’t like the situation if it was reversed.

12. Try to avoid dutch-courage such as using alcohol to boost your courage levels as this will often backfire.

13. Don’t ask someone out when they are in a group of friends. Timing is everything.

You know, online dating on the web is generally extremely safe, especially friendly and great fun and Top Dating Tips.com is committed to ensuring that it stays that way. It is safe dating because it is distance dating - simple. You do not come into contact with others initially and this may well provide you with a comfort factor that also allows you to pace yourself and be rightly choosey.

If possible though, you should try and follow a few basic online safe dating principles before deciding to pass over personal contact information to a relative stranger or arrange to meet them. It’s all too easy to get a little carried away when viewing personal ads so take things slowly and take a rain check every now and again. The tips here are from LoveBrowser.com. They may appear obvious to you but we think that if you do try and follow them, it can only assist you in ensuring you have happy online dating experiences. And you never know, Mr. or Miss Right may be just round the corner. We really hope so.

• Always trust your instinct, after all it has got you this far in life already.

• Take your time and view plenty of personal ads first.

•  Do not publish your phone number or email address in personal ads.

• Don’t take everything at face value.

• Do ask lots of questions when chatting.

• Ensure you feel comfortable at all times whoever you are chatting with.

• If someone is abusive to you, block them straight away.

• Don’t provide your home or work address to anyone you have not met.

• Before agreeing to a date, check that you know as much as possible

Don’t allow yourself to be talked into anything, whatsoever! You are the one in charge.

Also consider the following:

• Take your time to get to know someone. Don’t be rushed
• A patient person will be happy to wait until you are ready to meet
• Make sure you see plenty of photos if possible of the person you make friends with
• Ask your date to leave a message in your voicemail box before hand if possible
• Chat on the phone for a while before arranging a date, get to know each other
• Always meet in a public place that is well known and convenient to you
• Always tell a good friend where you are going, and who you are meeting
• If possible phone your friend during the date to confirm all is fine

And perhaps consider these points too:

• Always carry a cellular phone on a date if you have one
• Lunchtimes are good for dating, convenient, and they have a time limit
• Always make your own travel arrangements on a date initially
• Do not accept a lift home on the first date or reveal your address
• If travelling far, organize your own accommodation and confirm it
• Ensure you have as much information about your date as possible
• Keep your first date to a time limit so that you have an “exit” point
• Don’t feel you owe it to someone to meet them, you do not!

When we think of safe dating by sets of rules like this it can all get pretty silly and scary but the fact is that we are introducing ourselves to strangers without the company of friends. It will always be a wise choice to have a friend close by even if they are sitting at a nearby table. But whatever you decide is best for you, keep your wits about you and enjoy your date !!

You know, online dating on the web is generally extremely safe, especially friendly and great fun and Top Dating Tips.com is committed to ensuring that it stays that way. It is safe dating because it is distance dating - simple. You do not come into contact with others initially and this may well provide you with a comfort factor that also allows you to pace yourself and be rightly choosey.

If possible though, you should try and follow a few basic online safe dating principles before deciding to pass over personal contact information to a relative stranger or arrange to meet them. It’s all too easy to get a little carried away when viewing personal ads so take things slowly and take a rain check every now and again. The tips here are from LoveBrowser.com. They may appear obvious to you but we think that if you do try and follow them, it can only assist you in ensuring you have happy online dating experiences. And you never know, Mr. or Miss Right may be just round the corner. We really hope so.

• Always trust your instinct, after all it has got you this far in life already.

• Take your time and view plenty of personal ads first.

•  Do not publish your phone number or email address in personal ads.

• Don’t take everything at face value.

• Do ask lots of questions when chatting.

• Ensure you feel comfortable at all times whoever you are chatting with.

• If someone is abusive to you, block them straight away.

• Don’t provide your home or work address to anyone you have not met.

• Before agreeing to a date, check that you know as much as possible

Don’t allow yourself to be talked into anything, whatsoever! You are the one in charge.

Also consider the following:

• Take your time to get to know someone. Don’t be rushed
• A patient person will be happy to wait until you are ready to meet
• Make sure you see plenty of photos if possible of the person you make friends with
• Ask your date to leave a message in your voicemail box before hand if possible
• Chat on the phone for a while before arranging a date, get to know each other
• Always meet in a public place that is well known and convenient to you
• Always tell a good friend where you are going, and who you are meeting
• If possible phone your friend during the date to confirm all is fine

And perhaps consider these points too:

• Always carry a cellular phone on a date if you have one
• Lunchtimes are good for dating, convenient, and they have a time limit
• Always make your own travel arrangements on a date initially
• Do not accept a lift home on the first date or reveal your address
• If travelling far, organize your own accommodation and confirm it
• Ensure you have as much information about your date as possible
• Keep your first date to a time limit so that you have an “exit” point
• Don’t feel you owe it to someone to meet them, you do not!

When we think of safe dating by sets of rules like this it can all get pretty silly and scary but the fact is that we are introducing ourselves to strangers without the company of friends. It will always be a wise choice to have a friend close by even if they are sitting at a nearby table. But whatever you decide is best for you, keep your wits about you and enjoy your date !!

You are at a party and out of nowhere someone is standing close to you. Like a genie, they keep turning up, close by, catching your gaze. You go and chat and they stand in the same position as you, playing with their hair, laughing with you and holding your gaze. This person likes you and is flirting. How do you know? Because without realizing it, you are an expert in flirting and body language.

What would dating be without flirting. Flirting is fabulous, flirting is fun, flirting is giving out signals that we may be interested in someone, or we may be pretending. But within reason, flirting is part and parcel of our daily lives. Flirting can be harmful when it threatens fidelity but it can also be sexy and bring people closer together. Some people are good at flirting and some people hopeless.

Are you a flirt? If you are you know it and are secretly proud of the fact. It is sexy when you flirt and people like it. Flirting means giving people attention, it means, smiling, touching, whispering. In the right circumstances it is a powerful tool especially against the unwary. In the wrong circumstances it will get you fired. There is a gulf between flirting and unwanted sexual advances so beware.

It is useful to look at some of the key indicators of flirting and they can prove extremely useful when working out if the person across the table from you is interested. The one to keep your eye on the most is “mirroring”. Mirroring is when someone copies your body movements whilst retaining eye contact. Its is one of the biggest giveaways there is.

Eye Contact

• Pupils are dilated and eye contact is maintained
• Eye contact combined with an arched eye brow
• Any form of winking
• Rapid eye movement and blinking
• Eye contact where the gaze is held longer than usual. Men normally look away.

Hair and Mouth

• Playing with hair in a stroking or toying motion
• Eye contact whilst playing with hair
• Touching your hair at any time
• Lots of smiling, open mouthed and teeth flashing
• Lip licking
• Puckering lips in a simulated kiss form
• Any form of touch of the lips or teeth with tongue

Body Movement

• The thrusting of chest or breasts outwards whilst holding your gaze
• The copying of your posture - mirroring
• Holding your gaze whilst moving to music
• Using a posture with legs crossed towards you
• Leaning in towards you whilst holding your gaze
• Open legged posture facing you
• The display of flesh of arm or thigh

Touching

• They will want to touch you and will reach out to do so with some excuse
• They will offer to place food in your mouth as if feeding you
• They will play with their hands and then with yours

The Way they Speak

• Their tone and speed of conversation mirrors your own
• Lots of laughter and questioning tones
• In a group, you are singled out by this person for attention even in general conversation and questions. This happened to me in New York and I was taken aback how obvious it was.

The main thing to remember with flirting is that it is fun and so much more so when you are receptive to it and understand when it is happening to you. The best flirtatious moments will always take you by surprise.

Recently, after a casual final-week tryst between myself and some drunken floozy I picked up at the local pub, a friend of mine asked me why it seems that I “got no problem hitching the pootie ride” and he does. After ordering a shot of whiskey (in an effort to chase the phrase “pootie ride” out of my head) and following that up with a couple of beers, we got out our Sharpies (Terrell Owens accepts no substitutes so why should we?) and listed out the reasons he does not get laid and I do.

1. He cares too much.

Everywhere he goes, he focuses all of his attention on the opposite sex, going through all the trouble of introducing himself, buying girls drinks, and lying about his occupation and education while wearing five hundred dollar outfits and one hundred dollar cologne. I, on the other limb, digit and/or extremity, focus most of my attention on the bartender, who can best influence my budget and buzz. Women pick up on this, get wet, and await my charming pickup lines. All women want to date an abusive alcoholic (they love drama) and I make a very obvious first impression: I am a raging alcoholic who really doesn’t care about them. Don’t ask me why this works. I stopped asking why anything works or doesn’t work with women about fifteen years ago when Suzie Tackett kicked me in the shins because she thought I was cute. All I know is what’s true, Boo (I am very white).

2. He dates them.

Every time he gets serious about a woman, he shows up at her residence with flowers and chocolates, wears nice clothes and opens doors for her. This is all well and good if you live in fantasy land, but I live in a world where two people eating dinner is just that: a freaking meal. Dating is stupid; it puts undue stress on two people who are already working hard to talk themselves out of (or into) sleeping with each other. There is only one excuse for taking a woman anywhere you weren’t already planning on going alone: the sports lull. There’s a period of time between the end of football season and March Madness when I’m so bored, I’ll actually by flowers. Oddly enough, women sense this and I never get any play during the sports lull (see point 1: never care too much).

3. He is sensitive.

I have heard my friend say lines like, “She and I didn’t connect” and “I didn’t think Sheila and I were made for each other.” Chicks want to be chicks, not DATE chicks (except for, you know, some of the more open minded chicks). I, on the other hair follicle (why not?), am very insensitive. I often insult women while complimenting them (for example, I once told a chick she had a sexy gut and she was offended by the use of the word gut—women, can’t live with ‘em, can’t compliment their guts) and I never seem to remember anything important like their names. Maybe this is because I’m always drunk. Oh well. Who cares?

4. He expresses himself intelligently.

I can listen to my friend drone on about the different archetypes in American literature without ever getting bored because he is an interesting person who chooses interesting topics. Women want to talk about themselves and their friends and their parents and oh, well, damn near anything that has to do with them. When hanging with a female, I pretend to be a Fox News reporter lobbing softball questions at the Republican reps. I say things like, “Wow, I’ll bet that made you mad.” Ironically, this behavior requires less effort than just being myself, so it’s totally worth it.

5. He has a small penis.

This, however, is totally his problem.

I hope these five items have helped you understand why I have sex regularly with strange women and my friend does not. In doing so, I also hope that I have allowed women to look at themselves under a brighter light, while providing men with the opportunity to take better advantage of women’s sensual goodness.